Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things (1972) |
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Children Shouldn't Play with Dead Things (1972) |
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| General | Extras | ||
| Category | Horror |
Main Menu Audio Gallery-Photo Theatrical Trailer Trailer-Candyman, Candyman-Farewell ToThe Flesh, Trailer-Spontaneous Combustion, |
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| Rating |
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| Year Of Production | 1972 | ||
| Running Time | 86:33 | ||
| RSDL / Flipper | No/No | Cast & Crew | |
| Start Up | Menu | ||
| Region Coding | 1,2,3,4,5,6 | Directed By | Bob Clark |
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Studio
Distributor |
Geneni Umbrella Entertainment |
Starring |
Alan Ormsby Valerie Mamches Jeff Gillen Anya Ormsby Paul Cronin Jane Daly Roy Engleman Robert Philip Bruce Solomon Alecs Baird Seth Sklarey Robert Sherman Curtis Bryant |
| Case | PUSH-1 (Opaque) | ||
| RPI | $24.95 | Music | Carl Zittrer |
| Video | Audio | ||
| Pan & Scan/Full Frame | None | English Dolby Digital 2.0 (224Kb/s) | |
| Widescreen Aspect Ratio | 1.70:1 | ||
| 16x9 Enhancement |
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| Video Format | 576i (PAL) | ||
| Original Aspect Ratio | 1.85:1 | Miscellaneous | |
| Jacket Pictures | No | ||
| Subtitles | None | Smoking | No |
| Annoying Product Placement | No | ||
| Action In or After Credits | No | ||
Two years before unleashing the quietly ferocious slasher Black Christmas and his remarkably apocalyptic Vietnam zombie flick Deathdream, director Bob Clark first dabbled in the horror genre with this homage to George Romero’s Night of the Living Dead.
The intriguing, yet cautiously titled Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things tells the story of five young actors and their pompous production company director, Alan (Alan Ormsby), sailing off to a creepy burial island to conduct satanic rituals in an effort to raise the dead.
After digging up a fresh corpse, Alan attempts to bring it back to life but his incantations and camp flourishes appear to be a complete failure. Fortunately for the viewer, all is not lost when one of the group has their throat ripped out by a pasty-faced zombie and soon the rest of the irritating cast are forced to fight off a horde of flesh-loving living dead.
Shot in 14 days on a measly $40,000 budget, Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things is an astonishingly bad film. The script is intellectually barren and the acting so abysmal that you can’t wait for the characters to be turned into zombie food. Moreover, the entire feature revels in the type of “student movie” aesthetic that reeks of self-indulgence. Yet, surprising as it may seem, the film does manage to intermittently massage the viewer with a few moments of inspiration.
Perhaps it’s the tawdry mock marriage between Alan and the blue-haired zombie and the lurking Nosferatu-like vengeance it exacts on him later in the film? Or maybe it’s the eerie moment when the camera pans the pitch black forest and a light suddenly appears to expose a zombie chowing down on one of the characters? Or could it even be the slo-mo invasion of the rather cool looking zombies that ultimately challenge the already challenged cast? But, believe me, it’s these few rarefied moments that make sitting through the 86 minutes and 33 seconds of Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things a less painful experience.
Incredibly, Bob Clark is shooting a remake. The production began in September 2005 and the film is expected to be released in early 2006.
Interestingly, actor Alan Ormsby went on to direct the downbeat Deranged (1974), a film based on cannibal serial killer Ed Gein. Many regard Ormsby's film to be the most accurate depiction of Gein's sordid life ever made.
The film is presented in an aspect ratio of 1.70:1 and not 16x9 enhanced. However, the black bands on the top and bottom of the screen blend in so well with the dark print that you rarely notice that the film is not enhanced for widescreen monitors.
Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things would have to be the most poorly lit film I have ever seen. And unfortunately all of the action takes place at night. Thankfully, low level noise and grain is kept to minimum, but shadow detail suffers greatly as a result of the bad lighting and general softness of the print (see 4:10, 4:45 and 11:04 for examples). However, after the first 10-15 minutes your eyes begin to adjust to the images moving around within the murk and the film does become watchable.
Skin tones tend to take on a sickly grey/green hue, while the gaudy colours of the dreadful 70s clothes worn by the characters range from being oversaturated (33:10) to looking quite washed-out (35:35), depending on lighting levels.
The print is reasonably clean, with only the odd white speckling and hair line scratch making an appearance now and again.
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The Dolby Digital 2.0 mono mix is badly recorded.
Dialogue is often muffled, slightly out of sync and frequently plagued by audio hiss (54:10).
The soundtrack, which consists of a series of creepy ambient noises, such as moaning zombies and clichéd dramatic musical interludes, sounds hollow and lacks any punch.
Although there are a few instances where a 5.1 mix could have enhanced the soundstage, the surrounds and the subwoofer are silent in this quite lacklustre two-channel mono rendering.
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The unholy screams of a male victim over the sombre strains of a cello.
A series of seven lobby cards and an ad-mat designed to look like a dinner menu for zombies.
Not time-coded, this excellent trailer runs for approximately three minutes. Like all good trailers, it makes the film appear much better than it actually is.
Candyman - Dare you say his name five times…
Candyman 2: Farewell to the Flesh - Dare you say his name five times…again!
Spontaneous Combustion - A new force in fear…
NOTE: To view non-R4 releases, your equipment needs to be multi-zone compatible and usually also NTSC compatible.
The only difference between the bonus features on the Region 1 VCI Home Entertainment edition and ours is that the Region 1 has director/star text biographies.
Also, on direct comparison with the Region 1 VCI edition, our Region 4 transfer is slightly better. The contrast levels are more stable and images appear less hazy.
A Region 2 (UK) version released by Anchor Bay is also available. In comparison to the Region 2 our Region 4 edition misses out on:
• 16x9 enhancement;
• Dolby Digital 5.1 and DTS mixes;
• Commentary by writer/star Alan Ormsby.
However, the Region 2 edition runs approximately 10 minutes shorter than the Region 4 version. Evidently the missing footage is mainly scenes involving dialogue, so their absence is not necessarily a bad thing.
Collectors will want the Region 4 and Region 2 versions, but for my money the commentary, DTS and 16x9 enhancement would sway me to favour the Region 2 Anchor Bay edition.
Children Shouldn’t Play with Dead Things is a curious zombie film that will either have you strangely entranced by its bargain-basement production values or diving headlong for the remote control.
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| Review Equipment | |
| DVD | Yamaha DVR-S200 (it came free with the plasma), using S-Video output |
| Display | Yamaha 106cm Plasma. Calibrated with Sound & Home Theater Tune Up. This display device is 16x9 capable. |
| Audio Decoder | Built into amplifier. Calibrated with THX Optimizer. |
| Amplification | get a marshall stack, and crank it up. |
| Speakers | 2 x Bose Speakers and 4 NX-S200 Yamaha mini-speakers. |